Make no mistake: Online dating is tough, especially for guys.
Dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, Match, OkCupid, and eharmony are each filled with millions of active users who have all kinds of personalities that can make dating confusing and difficult. It’s enough to make guys wonder what women find attractive in men, how to be attractive to women, and when you’ll ever be successful in attracting women online.
But here's the thing: online dating doesn't have to be the trying experience that many people make it out to be. If you’re wondering how to attract women on dating apps, you’ve come to the right place.
We at The Match Lab conducted an online survey of 100 women across the United States, asking these women what they look for in a man on dating apps. All of the women surveyed were single, straight, and actively using dating apps.
Based on the results of our survey, we’ve compiled 12 tips for boosting your attractiveness and attracting women online through dating apps like Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, Match, OkCupid, eharmony, and more — and here, we share our best online dating tips with you. Read on to become more confident in your search and start seeing real results in attracting women and securing more dates.
How to Attract Women, Tip #1. Use Your Dating Profile to Tell a Story About Who You Are
When you’re deciding whether a movie is worth watching, you probably watch a trailer. And if you’re like most people, after watching a great trailer, you’re excited to see the full movie. A great trailer catches your attention, tells an intriguing story, and leaves you wanting more.
This is also how dating apps work. A great dating profile catches people’s attention, tells an intriguing story about you, and leaves people wanting more — it leaves them wanting to match with you and ultimately wanting to meet you.
A dating profile is the trailer of your life; it’s an advertisement for who you are. Just like the best movie trailers intrigue viewers to watch the full production, the best dating profiles intrigue viewers to meet the full person.
Your dating profile pictures don’t exist in isolation; they work together to tell a rich story about you. Our research has found that using the right photos in your dating profile is the #1 most important thing you can do to get more matches on dating apps. Guys, attraction doesn’t just happen; if you want to get better at attracting women, you need to tell an engaging story with your profile photos.
By telling a story, you can create an emotional experience for women who view your profile. Spend time creating a dating profile that masters storytelling and is unique to you. In our study, we found that women are frustrated by guys’ dating profiles being too boring and generic. Be the rare guy who stands out from the crowd. Create a profile that is fun and interesting. The best dating profiles showcase your personality, your hobbies, and your interests.
While your photos are a great way to tell your story visually, you also need to tell an engaging story through your written profile, whether that’s a bio, a few prompts, or both. For professional help with writing your bio and prompts, consider working with our professional dating profile writing service. We’ll connect you with an online dating expert who knows the science of what women find attractive in men and who can make sure your dating profile is set up for success.
How to Attract Women, Tip #2. Include At Least 4 Photos in Your Dating Profile
Include at least four pictures in your profile and ideally one or two more than that. Having five or six photos in your dating profile tends to be the sweet spot for attracting the most matches.
Each photo should add value to your profile — it should say something unique about you, what you look like, what kind of lifestyle you live, what interests you have, where you’ve traveled, and so on. Make the most of the photos you get to use in your profile. Avoid using photos that look repetitive.
And make sure you’re using high-quality photos that were taken recently, ideally within the past two to three years.
For help with selecting the best dating profile pictures, try our dating photo analyzer.
How to Attract Women, Tip #3. Use Dating Profile Pictures That Show Your Face Clearly
The women we surveyed in our study complained that a lot of guys’ dating profiles include pictures that don’t show their faces clearly. Be better than those guys. Make sure your photos clearly show what you look like.
And avoid sunglasses. Although one or two photos where you’re wearing sunglasses is generally fine, it’s best to avoid using photos with sunglasses in your profile if you can. Sunglasses and other accessories hide what you actually look like and make it harder for women to connect with you. When it comes to what attracts women to men, research shows that eye contact is a powerful way to connect with people on a deep emotional level, and sunglasses prevent eye contact from happening. Women want to see your eyes and what your face actually looks like. Plus, eye contact fosters stronger connections with your matches, so don’t let sunglasses take that away from you.
How to Attract Women, Tip #4. Be Genuine
It’s a simple piece of advice but a powerful one for attracting women: Be genuine. This was a common theme that came up over and over again in our research of what women find attractive in men. In our study, many women we surveyed said they feel that guys aren’t genuine on dating apps and that this is a huge turnoff. Women complained that guys aren’t honest, transparent, or authentic enough and that instead, a lot of guys just try to look cool. If you want to attract more matches on dating apps, be more genuine and sincere.
How to Attract Women, Tip #5. Be Clear About Your Intentions
Many dating apps give users the opportunity to specify what kind of relationship they’re looking for, whether that’s a short-term relationship, a hookup, something casual, a long-term relationship, a life partner, or something else. And there’s a good reason the apps do this: Other users want to know.
In our study of how to be attractive to women, we found that women want to know what intentions and expectations guys have. Many women said that they wish guys would be more upfront about what kind of relationship they’re looking for. Being clear about your intentions helps to attract the kind of people you want to date while filtering out people who wouldn’t be a good fit for you. By being on the same page with women about your intentions from the start, you can be comfortable knowing that you’re both on board for the same type of relationship.
How to Attract Women, Tip #6. Lighten Up
Guys, as should go without saying, be respectful toward women on dating apps. It’s never ok to be misogynistic or intimidating. That doesn’t mean you have to be overly formal and serious. Remember, you’re on a dating app, not LinkedIn. Lighten up and have some fun; just carry yourself respectfully.
In our study, many of the women we surveyed said they wish guys would be more playful and easygoing on dating apps. Having a sense of humor is one of the qualities women find most attractive in a guy, and dating apps are the perfect place to show your funny side. Take dating apps seriously, but don’t take yourself too seriously.
How to Attract Women, Tip #7. Use Proper Spelling and Grammar
Yes, this point makes the list. Proper grammar is attractive; spelling mistakes aren’t. Take the time to write well in your dating profile and when you’re messaging matches.
In our study, we found that spelling mistakes and bad grammar are huge turnoffs for women and make it less likely that a woman will want to date you. On the flip side, taking an extra few moments to proofread your messages before hitting that send button could mean the difference between attracting women and getting ignored.
How to Attract Women, Tip #8. Be More Open and Vulnerable in Your Dating Profile
Being open and vulnerable is important for connecting with other people, especially when it comes to men attracting women online.
Think of ways to express vulnerability on dating apps. For example, if you’re using Hinge, consider using one of their “self-care” prompts in your profile. Examples of these prompts are: “A boundary of mine is,” “I feel most supported when,” “My therapist would say I,” and “Therapy recently taught me.” By sharing your responses to one of these prompts, you can let women into your inner world, which is a powerful way to spark a connection.
How to Attract Women, Tip #9. Talk About Travel on Dating Apps
One clear takeaway from our research is that what attracts women to men, in a lot of cases, is a love for travel. In your dating profile, talk about where you’ve traveled in the past and where you’d like to travel in the future. Talking about travel is also a good topic of conversation when you’re messaging women on dating apps. If you’re not sure how to start talking about your travels, just ask her about her favorite places or vacations she took. You can even ask her if she has any plans for upcoming trips — this will give you an opportunity to share yours.
How to Attract Women, Tip #10. Include Travel Photos in Your Dating Profile
On a similar note, include photos of you from your travels in your dating profile. In our research, we’ve found that dating profiles that show pictures of guys from their travels tend to get more likes and matches. Whether it’s a historical landmark, a well-known site, or just a scenic view in another country, there’s a good chance that including it in your dating profile could help you get more matches and meet more women.
If you include a photo of you exploring somewhere new, include a photo caption saying something about that trip (e.g., what you loved about that destination, a story from your trip, a funny quote, how you felt in that photo, etc.). Many women will take note of how you describe your travels and be more inclined to strike up a conversation with you to ask about your favorite travel spots.
How to Attract Women, Tip #11. Show Off Your Pets
In our study, we found that women are attracted to guys with pets. If you have pets, include pictures of you with them in your profile. Photos with dogs tend to be most attractive for guys, but photos with cats help too. In addition to photos, it’s also an effective move to talk about your pets when messaging a match. Showcasing your bond with a pet is attractive because it shows women that you’re capable of caring for others.
How to Attract Women, Tip #12. Show Off Your Musical Talents
If you’re still wondering “What do women find attractive?” — well, look no further than your nearest musical instrument. In our research, we’ve found that women find musicians very attractive (yes, even if you’re not a professional musician).
Any musical instrument fits the bill, but women in particular seem to view guitar as the most attractive instrument a guy could play. Whether you play the guitar, the piano, or any other musical instrument, include a picture of you playing it in your profile, and you’re likely to become much more successful in attracting women online.
Start Attracting More Women on Dating Apps Now
If you’ve ever scratched your head when creating an online dating profile, wondering how to attract women, you can rest easy in knowing that we’ve done heavy lifting to find out what women find attractive in men.
Our research and expert dating tips are the winning combination you need to learn how to be attractive to women through your profile, get more dates, and find the matches that are perfect for you.
Get in touch with us at The Match Lab for advice and support throughout your online dating journey.
To discover which photos to use in your dating profile, try our dating photo analyzer.
For help with writing a dating profile, try our professional dating profile writing service.