As humans, we have an innate desire to be attractive. We all want to be desired. We want people to gravitate toward us instinctively, feeling drawn to who we are and how we act.
Being attractive has a lot of benefits in life. Attractive people have an edge in relationships, professional settings, and social circles.
And attractiveness isn’t just about physical appearance. It's a complex concept tied to several factors, including your personality, behavior, body language, career, grooming, mindset, style, and much more.
If you're wondering how to make yourself more attractive, you’ve come to the right place. In this post, we’ll explore easy tips and tricks that can help you become more attractiveness in many aspects of your life.
Before getting into specific tips on how to be more attractive, let’s delve into the meaning of attractiveness itself.
What is attractiveness? What does it mean to be attractive?
Philosophers have long debated what it means to be attractive. Plato, for example, believed that a person’s attractiveness was an objective quality that existed independently of who was viewing that person. In contrast, Immanuel Kant believed that beauty was a subjective experience that came out of a viewer’s imagination and emotions.
Attractiveness the magnetic pull that draws us towards certain people, whether in a romantic, professional, or social context. Attractive people compel us naturally to want to be near them and spend time with them.
Attractiveness is not something we can see or easily measure. It’s always changing and in the eye of the beholder.
To be attracted to someone means feeling a strong pull towards that person, whether physically or emotionally. Attraction often involves desire, infatuation, admiration, and affection.
What are the different types of attraction?
There are many different ways people can feel attraction to someone else. Here are some of the most common types of attraction:
Physical Attraction:
This is the most immediate and visible form of attraction. Physical attraction entails feeling drawn to someone's physical appearance, such as their facial features, body shape, or mannerisms. Physical attraction is often the first form of attraction that people experience, and it can play an important role in sparking initial interest or desire.
Sexual Attraction:
Sexual attraction refers to the desire to engage in sexual activity with another person. It involves feeling physically and sexually drawn to another person based on their physical appearance, behavior, or other sexual cues. From a biological perspective, sexual attraction is often related to the release of hormones such as testosterone and estrogen, which can increase sexual desire and arousal. Physical cues such as body shape, scent, and vocal pitch can also play a role in sexual attraction.
Romantic Attraction:
Romantic attraction involves feeling drawn to another person on an emotional level in a way that you desire a romantic relationship with them. It involves feeling emotionally drawn to another person, and desiring a deeper level of connection, intimacy, and unity with them.
Social Attraction:
This type of attraction involves feeling drawn to someone's social qualities, such as their personality, sense of humor, shared interests, and ability to communicate effectively. Social attraction can come about through shared experiences and interactions, and it often plays a key role in forming friendships and professional relationships.
Emotional Attraction:
Emotional attraction involves feeling a deep connection and resonance with another person on a more intimate level. This can involve feeling drawn to someone's emotional intelligence, empathy, and inner world. Emotional attraction can also involve feeling a sense of trust, vulnerability, and mutual understanding with another person.
Intellectual Attraction:
Intellectual attraction involves feeling drawn to someone's mental qualities, such as their intelligence, creativity, and curiosity. This type of attraction often emerges from shared intellectual interests and stimulating conversations.
Spiritual Attraction:
This type of attraction involves feeling drawn to someone's spiritual or philosophical beliefs and values. It can involve feeling a sense of shared purpose and meaning, as well as a deeper connection to something greater than oneself.
Why do humans care about attractiveness?
Humans care a lot about how to look more attractive. From a psychological perspective, attractiveness can be understood as a product of evolution. Over thousands of years, humans have evolved to view certain things as attractive and others as unattractive.
People across different cultures view different things as attractive. But studies have shown that certain traits, such as facial symmetry and confidence, are universally seen as attractive across different cultures. This is because these traits may signal good health, genetic fitness, and reproductive potential, which were important factors in survival and reproduction in our evolutionary past.
Simply put, we as humans care about attractiveness because it helps us reproduce, which enables our species to survive.
What do men find attractive in women?
Physical appearance is the most significant factor men consider in evaluating a woman’s attractiveness. This can include features such as facial symmetry, clear skin, hairstyle, physique, smile, and clothing style.
One key aspect of men’s judgments of women’s attractiveness is waist-to-hip ratio, which is a measurement that compares the circumference of a woman's waist to that of her hips. Studies show that men tend to find women with a waist-to-hip ratio of around 0.7 to be most attractive.
From an evolutionary perspective, a low waist-to-hip ratio may be seen as an indicator of a woman's reproductive health and fertility. Studies show that a waist-to-hip ratio of 0.7 or lower is associated with a lower risk of certain health conditions, such as cardiovascular disease and diabetes, as well as certain hormone levels and higher ability to conceive.
Beyond physical appearance, men also tend to find confidence, humor, intelligence, and kindness attractive in women. Confidence suggests a woman is comfortable in her own skin and has a strong sense of self-worth. A sense of humor can also be appealing, as it suggests a woman is fun-loving and doesn't take herself too seriously. Intelligence can also be attractive, as it suggests a woman is intellectually curious and has a depth of knowledge and understanding. Finally, kindness and empathy can be attractive, as they suggest that a woman is caring and compassionate towards others.
Other traits that men may find attractive in women can include a sense of adventure, passion for life, and strong communication skills. A woman who is willing to try new things and step outside her comfort zone can be appealing, as it suggests a sense of spontaneity and excitement. Similarly, a woman who is passionate about her interests and pursuits can be attractive, as it suggests she has a strong sense of purpose and direction in life. Finally, strong communication skills can be attractive, as they suggest a woman is articulate, confident, and able to express herself well.
What do women find attractive in men?
While physical appearance tends to matter less when it comes to men’s attractiveness in the eyes of women than the reverse, it still matters a great deal. While women have a wide range of preferences for men’s appearances, some commonly desired traits include a muscular physique, good hygiene, tall height, well-groomed appearance, and a good sense of style.
Beyond physical appearance, personality traits are often cited as key factors in what women find attractive in men. Confidence is one of the most appealing traits, as it suggests assertiveness, leadership qualities, and the ability to take charge. Kindness and empathy are also highly attractive qualities, as they suggest a caring and compassionate nature. A good sense of humor is often cited as another appealing trait, as it suggests the ability to be lighthearted and enjoy life.
Intelligence is another key factor in what women find attractive in men. While intelligence can take many forms, including academic achievement, creativity, and critical thinking skills, what is often most appealing to women is a man who is knowledgeable and curious about the world around him. This suggests an ability to engage in stimulating conversation and to provide interesting insights and perspectives and to show good problem-solving skills when they’re needed.
What do men find attractive in other men?
Physical appearance is an important factor, with many gay men expressing a preference for men who are fit, well-groomed, and dress well. Personality traits such as confidence, humor, and assertiveness are often cited as key factors in what men look for other men. Men who are comfortable in their own skin and who are able to express themselves confidently and authentically are often seen as more attractive.
A good sense of humor is also highly valued, as are intelligence and creativity. Men often admire other men who are creative and expressive for their passion, dedication, and uniqueness.
What do women find attractive in other women?
As with all the previous cases, physical appearance plays a role in what women find attractive in other women, as do confidence, sense of humor, kindness, and intelligence.
Shared values and interests can also be a powerful factor in attraction between women. Women who have similar goals, passions, and worldviews are often drawn to each other and can form strong, lasting connections.
Emotional intelligence is another key trait that many women look for in other women. Women who are able to express their emotions clearly and who are sensitive and empathetic to the emotions of others are often seen as more attractive and desirable.
How to be more attractive as a man
Wondering how to become more attractive as a man? Here are some tips:
Take care of your physical appearance:
Physical appearance is often the first thing that people notice, so it is important to take care of yourself. This can involve maintaining good hygiene, dressing well, and staying in shape through exercise and healthy eating habits.
Be confident:
Confidence is a highly attractive quality and is especially important for guys. Becoming more confident can involve working on your self-esteem, using better posture and body language, and taking on new challenges to build your sense of self-esteem.
Develop your social skills:
Social skills are key to building connections with others and creating a positive impression. Working on your social skills can involve practicing active listening, being empathetic, and developing your conflict resolution skills.
Learn a new language:
Learning a new language can make you more attractive by showing that you are curious, culturally expansive, and constantly striving to improve yourself. It can also be a great way to connect with people from different backgrounds and cultures.
Pursue your passions:
Having hobbies and interests that you are passionate about can make you more interesting and attractive. Taking up a new hobby or furthering your involvement with a long-standing interest, whether it’s playing a musical instrument or practicing a sport, are great ways to let your passions make you more attractive as a man.
Be adventurous:
Stepping outside your comfort zone and trying new things can make you more attractive by showing that you are confident and willing to take risks. This can be anything from traveling to a new destination, trying a new hobby, or meeting new people.
Be kind and respectful:
Treating others with kindness and respect can make you more attractive. Be considerate of others' needs and feelings and bring people up, not down.
Be decisive:
When a man is able to make decisions quickly and with conviction, it can demonstrate that he is a strong leader and can take charge in a situation. Being decisive can also signal a sense of purpose and self-assuredness in life.
Be open-minded and adaptable:
Being open-minded and adaptable can help you navigate new social situations and connect with a wider variety of people. This can involve being open to new experiences and perspectives, as well as being willing to step out of your comfort zone and try new things.
Have good posture:
Stand up straight with your shoulders back and your head held high. Good posture not only makes you look taller and more confident, but it can also convey an air of authority and strength.
Learn to cook:
Women love a man who knows how to cook. Investing in your ability to cook up a great meal for two is well worth it.
How to be more attractive as a woman
Wondering how to become more attractive as a woman? Here are some tips:
Build confidence:
Confidence is one of the most attractive qualities a woman can have. Work on building your self-esteem and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.
Be independent:
Independence is an attractive quality in a woman. Have your own interests and hobbies, and don't be afraid to pursue them on your own.
Cultivate your intelligence:
Most men admire an intellectually curious woman. Read books, take classes, and pursue knowledge in areas that interest you.
Be confident in your personality:
Embrace your personality and be confident in who you are. Don't try to change who you are to please others or fit in with a certain group.
Practice self-care and mindfulness:
Taking care of your mental and emotional well-being is an important aspect of attractiveness. Practicing self-care and mindfulness techniques such as meditation, yoga, or journaling can help you cultivate inner peace, confidence, and a positive outlook on life.
Cultivate your artistic talents:
Whether it's painting, writing, or music, developing your artistic talents can make you more interesting and attractive to others. Pursuing your creative passions can also help you develop a sense of confidence and individuality that is highly attractive.
Things men do that makes them unattractive
Being rude or disrespectful:
It’s a strong turnoff when a man is rude or disrespectful. If you want to be more attractive as a man, then treat others with kindness and respect.
Being arrogant or overly confident:
Confidence can be attractive, but arrogance can be a turnoff. It's important to strike a balance and avoid coming across as too full of yourself.
Lack of hygiene:
Poor hygiene or grooming habits can be a major turnoff. It's important to take care of yourself and be well-groomed.
Lack of ambition:
For men, lacking ambition or purpose can be unattractive. Having goals and aspirations can be attractive as it shows that a guy is driven, motivated, and knows what he wants.
Being controlling or possessive:
Controlling or possessive behavior can be unattractive and can signal a lack of respect for a partner’s autonomy and a lack of trust.
Being too self-centered:
Focusing too much on yourself and not considering another person's feelings or needs is unattractive. It's important to be attentive and considerate of the other person's feelings and needs in a relationship.
Being indecisive:
When a man can’t make decisions and needs to look to others for help deciding, it can suggest that he is unable to make choices based on his own values and beliefs. This can be unattractive because it makes a seem like he can’t think for himself.
Things women do that makes them unattractive
Being too needy or dependent:
Constantly seeking attention or validation from others is unattractive. It's important to be self-sufficient and not rely too heavily on others for emotional support or validation.
Being overly critical or negative:
Constantly complaining or being overly critical of others is a turnoff. Positivity and optimism are attractive.
Lack of confidence:
As for men, a lack of confidence can be unattractive for women too. It's important to be comfortable in your own skin.
Being manipulative or playing games:
Manipulative behavior or playing games can be unattractive and can signal a lack of respect for the other person's feelings and emotions.
How to be more attractive to women
In addition to the tips discussed earlier, here are some more things you can do to be more attractive to women.
Show respect:
Women appreciate men who are respectful and treat them as having great value and strength. See value in what they have to say.
Be yourself:
Trying to be someone you're not is insincere and unattractive. Be authentic. Embrace your inner qualities and let your personality shine through.
Be a good listener:
Women appreciate men who listen to them thoughtfully and engage in meaningful conversation. Show genuine interest in what a woman has to say and ask her thoughtful questions.
How to be more attractive to men
In addition to the tips discussed earlier, here are some more things you can do to be more attractive to men.
Develop your interests:
Men appreciate women who have their own passions and interests. Pursue something you're passionate about and share your enthusiasm with your partner.
Wear something unexpected:
Men appreciate women who are confident in their own style. Try wearing something unexpected, like a bold accessory or a unique hairstyle, to stand out from the crowd.
Be adventurous:
Men are often drawn to women who are open to new experiences and willing to try new things. Plan a fun adventure, whether it's trying a new restaurant or going on a spontaneous road trip.
Tease him:
Teasing can create a playful and flirty atmosphere, which creates a sense of anticipation. This can add an element of unpredictability and mystery, which can be intriguing and alluring.
How to be more attractive to your partner (boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, etc.)
Show interest in their life:
Take the time to listen to your partner’s interests, passions, and goals. Showing an interest in their life can make them feel appreciated and valued, which can help deepen your connection.
Practice active listening:
When your partner is talking to you, give them your full attention. Drop the phone, computer, tablet, etc. Use active listening techniques, such as nodding and repeating back what they said in order to show that you are engaged and interested in what they have to say. Ask thoughtful questions to gather more information about their perspective and know when it’s the right time to share your perspective.
Show affection:
Small acts of affection, such as holding hands or hugging, can help strengthen your emotional bond and enhance your attractiveness to your partner.
Surprise them:
Surprise your partner with thoughtful gestures, such as cooking their favorite meal or planning a surprise date night. These gestures show that you care and can help keep the spark alive in your relationship, making you seem more attractive.
Be supportive:
Support your partner through both the good times and the bad. Encourage them to pursue their goals and dreams, and be there to listen and offer support when they need it.
Communicate effectively:
Healthy communication is key to a healthy relationship. Listen to your spouse thoughtfully and express your thoughts and feelings clearly and respectfully. Express your perspective and keep the emphasis on how you feel, not on your partner’s tendencies. Let yourself be heard and be open to hearing your partner. This will help build trust and respect and strengthen your emotional connection.
Show appreciation:
Make an effort to show your partner that you appreciate them. Express gratitude for the little things they do and acknowledge their contributions to the relationship.
Why confidence makes you more attractive
Confidence is key to attractiveness. People are naturally drawn to those who exude self-assurance. This doesn't mean you need to be the loudest or most extroverted person in the room; in fact, that’ll make a lot of people dislike you. What it means is that you should feel comfortable in your own skin and project a sense of inner strength that shows a secureness in who you are.
Confidence shows inner strength:
Being confidence can make you more attractive because it shows your inner strength. When you’re confident, you show others that you have a strong sense of self-worth and are comfortable being who you are. This shows that you are not easily swayed by what other people think and are able to stand up for what you believe in and how you want to live life. When you’re confident, other people are more intrigued to spend time with you and see value in joining you for life’s journeys alongside you as your partner.
Confidence is contagious:
When you exude confidence, it can be contagious. People around you are more likely to feel good about themselves and their interactions with you when you are confident and self-assured. This is another reason why confidence is attractive: your confidence makes others around you feel good, which makes them naturally inclined to spend more time with you.
Confidence is a sign of competence:
People who are confident are seen as more competent, capable, successful, talented, and skilled. Your confidence can suggest that you’re able to handle challenges and be successful in your work and hobbies, which is attractive.
Why being authentic makes you more attractive
Authenticity is an often overlooked but powerful quality that can make you more attractive to others. Here are some reasons why being authentic works so well to make you more attractive: