Dating Tips

Funny May jokes: "What does May steep its tea in? Spring water." "What’s May’s favorite type of music? Heavy petal." "What’s May’s favorite type of investment? Seed funds."

Funny April jokes: "Why didn’t April showers bring May flowers this year? They forgot the address." "Why did April refuse to play cards? It was afraid of raining on everyone's parade." "How does April break up with winter? It says, "It’s not me, it’s May."

Funny March jokes: "How do you know March is feeling happy? There’s a little spring in its step." "Why did March have an identity crisis? It couldn’t decide whether it’s winter or spring." "Why did March go to therapy? To deal with its mood swings."

Funny February jokes: "How many seconds are there in February? One: February 2nd." Why is February bad in bed? It always finishes prematurely." What’s the only thing calendars can do when February ends? March onward."

Funny January jokes: "What’s January’s favorite body part? The cold shoulder." "What do you get if you cross January with a vampire? Frostbite." "How many seconds are there in January? One: January 2nd."

Funny Saturday jokes: "Who is Saturday’s favorite musician? The Weeknd." "Why does Saturday feel so strong? Because all 5 days before it were weakdays." "What's Saturday's favorite type of potato? Couch potatoes."

Funny Friday jokes for work: "Why is Friday my laptop’s favorite day? It finally gets to sleep." "What do you call a productive Friday? A plot twist." "What do you call an employee who starts a new project on a Friday? Delusionally optimistic."

Funny Friday jokes: "Friday is like a superhero that always arrives just in time to stop me from brutally beating my alarm clock." "What do Fridays and a cup of coffee have in common? Both are the best part of waking up." "Why did Friday become pessimistic? Because it realized the next day is a sadder day."

Funny Monday jokes: "What's the difference between Monday and an elevator? An elevator doesn’t always bring you down." "If each day is a gift, I'd like to know where I can return Mondays." "After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar just says WTF…"

Funny Sunday jokes: "What's Sunday's favorite food? A sundae." "Why did Sunday take an art class? To draw out the weekend." "What's Sunday's favorite type of music? The weekend blues."